The universe is merely a fleeting idea in God’s mind a pretty uncomfortable thought particularly if you’ve just made a down payment on a house.

Woody Allen

“To you, I’m an atheist.
To God, I’m the loyal opposition.”

Woody Allen

“To you, I’m an atheist.
To God, I’m the loyal opposition.”

Woody Allen

“Eighty percent of success is showing up.”

Woody Allen

‘Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.’

Woody Allen

“I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”

Woody Allen

It’s not that I’m afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

Woody Allen

Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Woody Allen

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